Zerrias Sorrow ~

I looked around, the forest that surrounded me was quiet, the wind gently flew through my mane causing it to sway gently in the rhythm of the gentle gusts, the leaves on the trees rustled quietly, I could hear birds chirping, it was a calming tune "you know, iv been strong, iv been supportive and carried a heart of gold, to be there always for those close to me, but, the darkness... I'm afraid it's just too strong for me to handle now, why do I bother sticking around, what's my purpose" I said in a quiet, stuttering voice, I looked to the sky, it was slowly becoming night, the sky had a mixture of purples and pinks as the sun slowly vanished from sight, the colours slowly faded, and were replaced with glittering stars, my mind was running actively, all the most horrifying thoughts began to flood my mind, blanketing my good thoughts, my bottom lip began to quiver, tears welding up in my eyes "no...no I don't want this.." I said in a slightly chocked up voice, the tears then slithered down my cheeks, my ears pinned back to my skull, if I were to let the voices and thoughts win I'd go insane, I lowered my head, my eyes widened as I stared at the dark ground beneath me, my heart racing, I clenched my teeth together, my breathing intensified strongly, my body began to quiver, I felt as if my body was being consumed by evil, I saw my tears hit the ground, I couldn't move, I felt paralysed, "no...." I said in a quiet squeaked voice, I began to cry heavily, wanting the suffering to end, I lifted my head and let out a loud scream, as I lowered my head I raised my two front hooves and began to squeeze the sides of my skull, I felt like I was going insane, the voices were telling me to hurt myself, I cried and shouted trying to ignore them, the thoughts of death made my heart race, they blanketed my good thoughts and for some reason I was unable to replace them "no go away!! I don't want this!! Please...." I said in a struggling way, I cried heavily, I then felt the coldest and most terrifying chill pulse through my entire body, my eyes widened and I then jumped and rammed my head into a tree, I screamed again, it was consuming me, the fear and suffering, I didn't want to let it win, I couldn't let it win, I wanted a way to get rid of the suffering, I was becoming weak, after suffering this every night for the past 4 years, some nights were ok, but others were like a living nightmare, like tonight.
"Please...." I said sadly, my tears now staining my fur on my face, I stared at the ground as I kept my head firmly against the tree, I sniffled and sighed, I slowly moved away from the tree, I looked  up at the sky, my mind filled with the one question, what is the purpose of life? What happens when you pass away? I began to cry again, fearing the after life, would I ever see my loved ones ever again, you see, I go thought this every night, it's scary, no one ever understands me, they think I'm insane or overreacting, maybe I am overreacting, but, it scares me intensely, and for some reason I can't get rid of the thought, it blankets anything else I try to think of, "I don't what to do, I'm lost, but I can't give up!!" I said and took a deep breath then exhaled, looking to the stars, I flared out my wings, now feeling the soft breeze pass by, I knew I was growing weak, but I couldn't give up, never, I'd always be there for my friends, I'd be strong from them, forever and always.